finding joy: 2011

the smallest things.

"Sometimes,' said Pooh,

'the smallest things

take up the most room in your heart."

I sat in this chair a year ago, on the last day of 2010, thinking about what 2011 would bring. I wondered, and prayed, and hoped, and dreamed about the possibilities that might happen. It was the closing of a year and the beginning of a new.

I even chose a word.

Contentment.

january 2011

And early, very, very early in my year of seeking contentment, I experienced one of my most crushing, most difficult, moments as a mother. I was raw, on my knees, at the foot of Jesus in prayer for my Samuel. It was this deep valley with fear, anxiety, and sadness that tried to take root in my soul. I was helpless -- watching and praying and utterly humbled in those early months of 2011. It was Celiac Disease.

Somehow in those days of rawness and fighting I began to see life through a different lens. A smallest things kind of lens. It started when I sat in the teeny darkened hospital room while I stared at the monitor that blinked showing Samuel's pulse, and oxygen, and listened to the steady swish of his iv. I was broken. In that place, a place I never wanted to be, I prayed, Come unto me you who are burdened and I will give you rest. I was weary.

Rest didn't mean taking away the pain. Rest didn't mean leaving the hospital immediately. Rest was deeper.

Simpler.

Rest came.

I found it.

Not in the big things, no, not at all.

But, in the smallest, the simplest things of life.

No longer did the big goals seem to be what my heart yearned for -- instead it switched to simple and small gratitude. And in that spirit of gratitude I began to live. Deeply. Aware that joy in life can come from the small moments, the gifts, and in the simple joys found in the everyday.

It started with me being grateful for those monitors that beeped. Then for the bed. And the nurses. And labs. And it grew and grew and grew.

In the sweet sayings of a four year old.
Flowers from a Trader Joe's employee.
A phone call from a doctor.
Rain in the morning.
Prayers from a son.
Coffee bought by my daughter for me with her money as a surprise.

Those smallest things have become beautiful things in my heart.

So now, as I sit here, in the same chair with an entire year spread in front of me I wonder the same wonders as last year. I wonder what the year will bring. But, I will also be aware, watching, looking -

For the smallest finding joy things in life.

For they are the biggest.

Goodbye, 2011.

how barnes and noble reminded me of motherhood.

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It was just Barnes and Noble.

Overly crowded with eager shoppers scoping out the deals on the table marked with big red 50% off dots. People huddled around the NOOK counter waiting and wanting one of their own.

I made my way through the mass of people, with a heart feeling a bit heavy, and pushed my way into the Barnes and Noble Cafe.

Coffee.

But, it wasn't the coffee that greeted me. Instead it was this flood of memories. Nostalgia. There was something about the smell, the mood, and the music that brought me back to me when I was in college. I'd study at the coffee shop {Borders, I believe} and pull out those architecture history books while sipping my coffee and eating a huge slab of bread and cheese. Life felt so full of opportunity. Adventure, I guess.

I wondered.

I wondered as I walked to the counter staffed with two college looking gals. I wondered about the me that used to come to a place just like this. I wondered if that me would have recognized this me.

The mom.

I ordered my half-calf caramel macchiato and listened while I waited as the two gals chatted about their weekend -- where they went, and what they got, and what they'll be doing. I wondered what they thought of their future. I wondered what they thought of me. Or if they knew I was a mom. Or that I had seven kids.

The piping hot coffee was placed on the worn counter. As I walked out of the cafe area, where all those memories came flooding back, I didn't leave wishing things were different. Or wanting to be that person who studied so hard trying to remember which kind of flying buttresses were in each cathedral. No, instead I walked out grateful for who I am today even though it doesn't come close to who I ever imagined that I would be on those coffee studying days of my past.

I like me.

And I love being a mom.

Being a mom is a great thing. An excellent thing. So often it's easy to take what I do, what you do, and dismiss it as just being a mom. But there's more to it. Just being a mom takes passion, determination, perseverance, diligence, lack-of-sleep, coordinating, wearing your heart on your sleeve, toughing it out, meal planning, budgeting, not trying to worrying, nursing, teaching, cuddling, cooking, cleaning, praying, and so much more.

It should not be dismissed.

I'll hold my mom head high in that coffee shop.

And you should too.

8 Steps to Cleaning up After Christmas

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This was written last year, but I thought it worthy to share again. I had written a a post over at The Homeschool Post detailing why I don't clean up the day after Christmas. (You can read it here Christmas Mess.) Well,then after that I followed it up with how I actually attack the Christmas clean-up -- it can be overwhelming, but with a great strategy it can be doable. Don't let the clean up rob you of joy. ~rachel

1} Have a good attitude. Yes. I just wrote have a good attitude and as I tell my kids I mean it. Here's why. I have found that is incredibly easy to slip into a posture of grumbling as one removes ornaments, or puts away presents, or sweeps up pine needles, and reclaims the kitchen. Yes, it's work. But, honestly, it's work that I must remember to be grateful for -- so many blessings that could be overlooked.

2} Create mini-goals. When I look at the entire clean up process it's easy to get a bit frazzled by the scope of what to do. So I create smaller objectives and goals. Gather the ornaments. Bring in the tote boxes and sort. Take Christmas lights off outside. Wash Christmas dishes. And gradually it will all get done. It helps to have mini-rewards as well. Like, for instance, a latte when the tree is all done. ;)

3} Donate. Sometimes I'll work through this step prior to Christmas, but on years where I miss it {like this year} I'll bring a big box down into our laundry/storage room and fill it with items that we can donate. Games that got played only a couple times, toys that we've outgrown and more. I'll also bring a big black contractor garbage bag down and work to fill it with stuff that is broken or just doesn't fit the "donate" category. And, lol, I have to work to actually schedule my pick-up for that donate stuff -- often it sits in a corner in my garage -- for far too long.

4} Keep one thing out. Last year we kept the top of our Christmas countdown chain hanging high in our dining area. It can be a really small and simple thing -- like the paper chain -- or it can be something more elaborate. My reasoning? Serves as a reminder of Christmas and keeps our family grateful for the gift of Christ's birth.

5} Roll the tree. This really only applies to those of you who purchase real trees -- but feel free to do it with your artificial one. Once the tree is outside waiting for pickup I'll take the tree and roll it around looking for the ornament that we forgot to pull off. I'm thinking I'm going to make a special box for that one ornament for the next year -- the ornament that almost didn't make it -- or something like that and then it can go on first the following year. Make sure to organize those ornaments now before next year. You'll be grateful next December.

6} Get the kids involved. Make taking everything down as festive as putting it up. I'll assign roles -- one to get ornaments off, one to sort them {we sort by child}, one to help wrap, one to roll garland, etc... It makes the work light and much more fun. It also helps remind them to be grateful for all the blessings that they recently received.

7} Enjoy that moment where the house feels like it's gained an enormous amount of space. Seriously. Have you ever had that? Once the tree is down your house feels like you've gained another room? It's crazy how much extra space I feel like I have then -- so I truly try to remember it for those times when I feel like we're too crowded.

8} Be thankful. Take a moment and just be thankful. For your family, for the time to spend together, for the freedom to celebrate Christmas, for the year, and for the new year, for health, for the presents that you received, and so forth. Let the process of taking down the Christmas decorations be a lesson of gratitude.

On my schedule today? More of the above. I've taken down about 1/4 of the Christmas decorations. I must say that I love it right now that Minnesota is so warm -- it helps with organizing the Christmas totes in the corner of the garage. Although I do miss snow. Sigh.

**edited to add - this year, 2012, we've had an abundance of snow and the typical cold temps. :)

How about you? What are your Christmas clean up strategies?

Favorite photo{s} of 2011

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I'm joining with my friend Sam, from Sam's Noggin, for a dual link-up where we're encouraging you to find your favorite photo {or in my case photos} from the year. I decided to focus on finding a photo that had a great deal of meaning to me. Then as I was driving home from the store yesterday I started to realize which photo had tremendous significance.

It's this one.

Samuel was running.

And to run one needs to be full of vitality. This was taken in early June just after his second biopsy to determine if he was healing from Celiac Disease. For months and months prior to this photo he was so sick -- terribly sick, in and out of the hospital, seeing doctors and more -- and all I wanted for him was to be a kid. And this photo? It captures the sweet Samuel running and in the background the thankfulness I felt to just see him run.

So can you do it? Can you narrow it down to just one? Find your photo{s}, grab the button, and link-up below. Your links will show up on both blogs. :) And make sure to visit Sam's wonderful blog -->> Sam's Noggin.

miscellany type observations

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First, I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. Our weekend was busy -- full of family, and good {make that great} food, games, driving, rest, and being grateful for our Savior's birth. Of course, over the weekend I made several observations regarding what works, what needs to change, and things that made me laugh.

Here's my post Christmas miscellany.

1} A Higher Dollar Amount Does NOT Guarantee Present Enjoyment. Case in point. The Friday before Christmas I still had some stockings to stuff. Stockings for a family of nine can easily break the bank -- so my hubby suggested I check out the dollar store. While there I picked up a whoopie cushion for Elijah. Which became his favorite gift. Go figure.

2} Watch out where you sit. Now that we have a whoopie cushion in the house one must be very careful if Elijah comes by and says momma stand up quick for me and now sit down. And then laughs. Then when you sit down make sure you sit down very dramatically as to cause the four year old of yours to laugh even harder.

3} Gluten Free Cookies Rock. Especially my chocolate brownies with the mint frosting. I might have had to taste test several of them. Well, make it more than a couple. Just look at that very full plate of those brownies sitting there. Sigh...

4} Read my post at The Post. I wrote about not cleaning up the Christmas mess. I am going to need to print it out and remind myself of it today -- as I trip over new toys, find homes for new clothes, deal with left-over cookies, and exchange some presents. Such a gift to be blessed with all of that new stuff -- that's what I need to remember. Click this title to hop over there -- Why You Shouldn't Clean up the Christmas Mess.

5} Pictures always Win. My family {brother, sisters, nephew, and my brother's awesome dog - Leo} gathered together in October, took a picture, and had it printed on canvas for my parents. In the process, we managed to snag a couple extra pics of my kids, my sister and her son, and some silly shots of me with my siblings. These pictures? A goldmine of meaningful presents. The pic below? My family.

6} Case in Point. My father-in-law's response when he opened the present of his grandkids {my kids} in a beautiful framed print. I love that he loves us so so much. And we love him just as much in return. :)

7} The Netbook. Remember that picture with me holding the little Acer Netbook? Well, that was my parents -- which they let me borrow when I went to Relevant and then let me use for a bit {a long bit -- our desktop is now a paperweight desktop}. Yesterday, at their house, they blessed our family with a new netbook {I don't have a picture yet} - this is a HUGE blessing. I use it for writing posts, for homeschooling, and now my parents have theirs back. ;)

8} Favorite Picture from 2011. My friend, Sam, from Sam's Noggin, and I are hosting a link-up where you can pick your favorite picture from 2011. I know, I know, one picture? How on earth do you choose? So get your thinking caps on and decide which picture you'd pick {and I'd let it slide if you did more than one} and come on back to link up. I've included the linky code if you want to grab it and write your post today -- it will go live tomorrow morning. :)

9} Games. Books. And Rest. That's what's on my plan for the rest the day. We've got some really fun new games -- including the deluxe edition of Apples to Apples {we love that game} -- that I want to play with my family. Yesterday, at my parents we played Dicecapades -- equally fun and crazy. Playing with my family is certainly a favorite thing! And eating those cookies...

10} Social Media. I took two days off. No tweets, facebooks, blogging, email checking or anything. It was strange to have everything so "silent" and yet it was so incredibly needed. Make sure to intentionally do this in your life. So today, I'm trying to ease back into the online world -- slowly -- and that's okay. You want to make sure to capture the real moments, the wonder in life, and often that means intentionally stepping back.

How about you? How was your Christmas?
Any new fun family games that you must share with me?

linking up with my sweet friend, Carissa.

Merry Christmas!

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For unto us a child is born

unto us a son is given

and the government shall be on his shoulders.

And he shall be called

Wonderful Counselor,

Mighty God,

Everlasting Father,

Prince of Peace.

I'm closing the computer screen for these two days -- and I'm grabbing some cookies {okay more than a couple}, enjoying my family, and most importantly basking in the true meaning of Christmas -- the birth of Jesus. Praying that you too, can have a beautiful day, a set-aside day, where you can enjoy your family and have true joy!

Merry Christmas!

cookies, cookies, cookies. and friday favorites.

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Dear friday favorite things,this is week 41 that you've been aroundand I must say that this is one of my favorite waysto list some favorite moments from my week.

Dear Minnesota,

We have no snow.

I like having snow at Christmas.

Here's a picture of me in last year in December

just in case you forgot what snow actually looks like.

Dear little boy who tries to sneak cookies,

I know that you ate at least eight cookies yesterday.

And I can hear your little

moh--cookies, momma

coming from your sweet little body.

Okay...just one more.

Dear little boy who likes to sneak the royal icing,

It is not butter.

I know you keep telling me the yellow one is butter,

but all that tasting that you're doing won't change it to butter.

Dear little boy who is in awe of the cookie decorating,

You are just too cute.

And yes, you may have one more cookie.

Dear Bob's Red Mill and other gluten free flour manufacturers,

You really helped me this Christmas.

Even though it takes a blend of 3-5 different flours
you must know that

my cookies taste great.
To read more about my traditions go to my guest post at Sharing the Journey here

Dear gluten free sugar cookies,

Shhh...I like you better than the flour cookies that I made last year

that had gluten in them.

Yes, you took a bit more work, but oh my, oh my,

I'm like that little boy who needed

one moh cookie.

Dear Target,

Please have enough lanes open so that I don't have to wait too long in line.
No picture, but definitely a favorite when there is no line. :)

Dear Hannah,

Thank you for editing these pictures for me.

I love the time that you put in them

and am grateful for your help.

Dear little boy who likes those cookies,

Thank you for all of your help today
with frosting
and taste-testing.

Dear blog readers,

Thank you for all your kind comments

and encouraging words.

I am thankful for you all

Blessings on your day and your Christmas!

Signed,
me
{rachel}

Grab the button,
write your own favorites or grab your favorite post,
and link on up!

the smallest things.

Top 2011 Posts - Friday Favorite Things Style

how barnes and noble reminded me of motherhood.

8 Steps to Cleaning up After Christmas

Favorite photo{s} of 2011

miscellany type observations

Merry Christmas!

cookies, cookies, cookies. and friday favorites.

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