the mom handbook

inspired by my mom confession post from last week.

No two children are ever alike.

No two mothers are alike. Amen.

No two stories will ever be alike.

When they are still, which will be rare, take a picture.

There is grace to start over again. At 8:30. 8:40. 8:42. Well, you get that picture too.

When kids clean their room all clothes immediately become dirty clothes. Trust me, you'll find them in the laundry and then at that point those clean clothes are truly dirty clothes.

It's normal for the back of your vehicle to look like this during October.

Laundry becomes a source of discussion between you and your friends. It will be called Mount Washmore, the enemy, and the bane of one's existence. By the way, what is your strategy?

The days when you need coffee the most will be the day you have no way to get coffee.

What works for one child won't work for the next. Think you got potty training down? Think again.

Sleep will just be a distant, and lovely, memory.

Hold those sleeping in your arms babies just a minute longer before you attack the to-do list. You'll remember that, not that the to-do list was completed.

Tshirts from Target make acceptable and appropriate Target shopping attire. Important note: While shopping at Target don't wear a red tshirt. With khaki pants. Ever.

Construction sites by your home become an unbelievable gift. And break.

Juice, milk, food, or anything of comparing value can equally be poured into separate containers with children watching who need to make sure that absolutely everything is fair and equal.

Instagram becomes your family scrapbook. (I love instagram. like love. Find me -> finding_joy

Shoes become a nemesis. When one is late there will always be, and I repeat always, one shoe mysteriously missing and you will spend precious minutes searching - under couches, in the closet, in rooms, in the car, by the back door, downstairs, in the kitchen, anywhere for that shoe.

Instead of counting to ten you skip count to one hundred. Twice.

When people ask you what do you do you've learned to just smile.

What you do - stay at home, work, work at home, work part time, etc... -- that stuff doesn't define mothers.

Always keep an emergency stash of chocolate in two places. Make the second place the emergency supply for when the emergency chocolate is gone.

The plastic cups from Ikea are your go-to beverage holder choice.

Your phone will have preschool apps on it.

Sometimes you just need to laugh.

Teaching them to ride a bike requires training for yourself - in running, not tripping, catching, and letting go.

Actually, most of motherhood is a journey in letting go.

It's really really letting go when you let them drive the teeny cart.

That's so not fair are words you hear in your home everyday.

You multitask like you were on steroids.

Tag removing from clothing becomes normal.

You have pinterest boards specifically designed for cleaning difficult things. Like permanent marker on laminate flooring. Don't ask me how I know about that one - like perhaps coming home and seeing the entire floor covered in permanent marker drawings.

Saying I love you is a daily, and most important, thing.

Saying I love you is so easy when they're in bed sleeping looking perfect.

Remember that motherhood is really a brave thing. Don't question that. Celebrate it.

You can get coffee with your bff with children that are unruly and still look perfectly calm.

The words I'm hungry, I'm starving, I'm actually really hungry, can I have a snack will also be frequently heard.

Even though there is a great deal of apparent hunger what you made for dinner will not be the solution.

You will spend many many many hours discussing snacks.

Did I mention that the words no fair will frequently be heard?

A break often consists of a trip to Target or the grocery store by yourself.

You know that motherhood is a gift. Most days.

Little things matter. Always.

How about you? What would you add? I'd love to add them to the post and build a cool collection of mom notes.

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Today's photos? All real life live from the instagram feed. Find me there at finding_joy
Images and original content are sole property of Rachel Martin and may not be used, copied or transmitted without prior written consent.

Want to read some you got this brave mom letters? Check out my ebook with 21 original letters.

you might be a mom...

some simple things. some in humor. some real.

...if you can pick up paper, legos, a shirt, or pencils with your toes.
...if your morning coffee is shared with all around.
...if you consider going up and down the stairs with laundry part of your workout.
...if you avoid the cereal aisle with littles due to all the toys that they display across from the cereal.
...if you can change a diaper in the back seat with only one wipe.
...if you've memorized Good Night Moon and Are you My Mother and Cat in the Hat.
...if your morning wardrobe selection consists of wondering which color t-shirt to wear.
...if your day is divided into snack time segments.
...if you've ever thought of getting a this vehicle stops at all railroad crossing sign for your car.
...if you've ever thought of getting a taxi sign for your car.
...if you no longer have a car and now only have a large suv or van and you want those signs.
...if you realize the oh, you look tired comment is probably really true.
...if your eyes tear up when watching commercials.
...if you can actually steer the gigantic kid seater cart at Target.
...if you've claimed the back row at church as your family's row.
...if your purse contains a diaper, gum, barbie shoes, coupons, and a board book.
...if you go through a pack of bandaids within a week.
...it you're not afraid to stand in the road so that cars slow down while your children bike on the side.
...if you can cook dinner, teach math, clean the kitchen, and answer an email at the same time.
...if you know that sometimes the best thing and only thing needed is a hug.
...if you give and give and give of yourself.
...if you use hairbindies as rubberbands. Or vice versa.
...if your pinterest board has categories for art, birthdays, fun, might do, and disney.
...if you can fall asleep within 4.3 minutes of sitting still.
...if half of your dvd collection consists of veggie tales, thomas the tank engine movies, and pixar.
...if your netflix recently watched is the same as above.
...if you find yourself wondering when that teenager grew up.
...if you do a happy dance when the calendar has nothing scheduled. for the morning.
...if you can proudly drink out of a plastic ikea cup.
...if you refuse to ever wear mom jeans.
...if you've nodded several times during this list. And grabbed a bindie from the deck of cards.
...if you let yourself lose at checkers. or memory. or chutes and ladders.
...if you find yourself standing in the doorway of your children's room and praying for them at night.
...if you are okay with serving breakfast for three meals in a row.
...if the house isn't perfect and you're still content.
...if you've got at least one pair of black yoga pants referred to as your go-to pants.
...if you're summer tan comes from spending time at the park.

...and if you everyday get up, pull your hair back, answer to the never ending mom cry, and still go to bed feeling grateful, content, and thankful. And tired. And laughing remembering the two year old wearing his fourteen year old sister's glasses.

Interested in some Dear Mom Letters? Check out a couple here - Dear Mom with the Little One Crying in the Store, Dear am I enough Mom, Dear Moms with Littles.  Also, take time to check out the 10 Days of Intentional Parenting series.
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thirty signs of summer

A simple post today with reasons - and pics from last summer - telling me that summer is here. Oh yes, and it goes beyond us wishing to have fresh corn on the cob bought from the farmer in the field almost every night. Which, by the way, at $4 for a dozen ears is absolutely amazing. Plus, I love pulling the car over by the corn field and stepping out and grabbing two bags with a dozen ears of corn.

So here are only thirty signs of summer. Because, you know, I could expand this to one hundred. :)

1. The air conditioner is running full blast before the sun comes out.
2. My hair gets poufy inside with the airconditioner running.
3. We do math in July because it's too hot to go outside and we decide it's more fun to stay cool and catch up on math facts.
4. Watermelon is for lunch.
5. And strawberry shortcake {with a gluten free shortcake} is for dinner.

6. The schoolwork from April is still on the door to the garage.
7. You count down the days until you can go to the lake.
8. Fishing is fun. {this is for those of you who live in Minnesota - besides look at that view.}

9. The house stays clean because everyone decides to play outside.
10. Curriculum catalogs that come in July become reading material at the beach.
11. Looking at pictures of snow makes you a bit nostalgic until you see the shovels hanging in your garage behind the rakes.
12. Your kids love sitting in the front yard watching construction vehicles roll by.

13. The garden is in bloom and you can finish that lesson on botany when you harvest the peas that started as seeds.
14. You finally finish the annual clothing {big sigh} switch.
15. The what shoes shall I wear today choice becomes flip flops or sandals?
16. If it's sunny you're outside playing. Or picking weeds. Or looking for raspberries.
17. You take pictures of fireworks.

18. A pony tail is the only hair style of choice versus the every other day choice during school months.
19. You go down to the laundry room to get cool not to just catch up on laundry.
20. You marvel at the amount of towels that one must wash and dry thanks to the constant flow of children that run through the sprinkler.
21. Then again, sprinklers are a family's best go-to friend during those hot summer months.

22. Iced coffee is the only coffee that one considers ordering at the coffee shop.
23. You write blog posts on the deck with birds singing, iced coffee in hand, and the sounds of sprinklers around.
24. You can finally attempt the science experiment of trying to cook an egg on the sidewalk on those extremely hot days. If that doesn't work you can look for ants.
25. You water your annuals twice a day to keep them alive while wishing that you had instead purchased more hardy perennials back at Lowes in May.

26. Garage sale signs are the norm on every street corner.
27. The littles want to play outside at 8am and you tell them it's a great time to go outside and to do more chores later while it's cooler.
28. Sunscreen sits on your counter.
29. Pool Noodles are used as light sabers in the backyard.
30. Oh yes, and in case you forgot point four about watermelon being for dinner, it can actually be for any meal and create great joy in those little one's lives. Watermelon {and summer} hear me roar!

How about for you?
What are your signs that summer is now here?

****
This post is part of the ihomeschool network's top ten tuesdays linkup {answers to the why we love homeschooling are in italics} and is also linking up with my friend Angie's Top Ten Tuesdays. I've got thirty - so I think it qualifies!
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little things that make a house a home

It's Monday. And on Mondays I tend to give myself permission to write just a bit more random, you know? So as I sat to write this {on Sunday...lol..or else it wouldn't be ready for Monday} I decided to spend some time thinking about things that make my house our home. Little things unique to us and little things that I love.

Like these.

Rock em Sock em Robots. Yes, some of you may have this delightful toy of the past, but do you use it do decide things at a stalemate? Like whose turn is it to sweep? Or take out the trash? Or grab the mail? If you don't, might I encourage you to try it? Grin. Just call me the Red Rocker.

Me. With Short Hair. And 2 Kids. Let's see, this picture is probably about 12 years old now. And, yes, I had short hair. And also yes, Samuel looks a bit like Chloe. And also thirdly yes, Hannah was quite terrified of that Santa. That picture? On our fridge. Reminds me of when I was younger looking. ;)

Iced Coffee. This is my newest favorite thing. I could have written about it on Friday for Friday Favorite Things, but then that wouldn't be fair to you all as I'd be enjoying it for a week before you could even buy it. What compelled me to buy it? That would be the coupon that spits out at the end of a transaction. And a very sweet husband who runs to the store to get it for me. Delicious and yummy {see, I even added those words as an added bonus.}

Measuring Cheat Sheet. Every household needs one. I don't care how good you are at math, really, when it comes to the heat of cooking, and you're in the midst of that fabulous recipe, the last thing you want to do is doubt your math. Enter the $1 purchase at the Target Dollar Section and the find that really keeps on giving with correct measurements.

Elijah and the Nintendo DS. Something we try not to make a regular site in this house. He loves to play this Mario game -- March of the Minis -- where you solve puzzles. If it's too quiet, he's found the DS and is probably hiding in his room under his covers. He's pretty covert. ;)

Art, pencils, and Star Wars. All found in my older boys' room. Art, made by Brennan several years ago that he taped on his wall. {Yes, I let him...they're only young once.} A pencil bucket made out of an old flowerpot with clear beads pressed on. And a Star Wars vehicle. All part of a room that my older boys inhabit. I'd show you the floor, but sigh, then I'd have to title this one -- legos, bad guys, pencils, paper, blocks, duplos, books, socks, playmobil, starwars, and art. 

A favorite cleaner. Love this stuff. Worth the price at Target, which by the way, I can totally afford since I got a steal of a deal when I got that measuring thing for a dollar. As you can see, because it's almost empty, this is totally used in our home. Natural. Without that gross smell. And it cleans fabulous.

Verses in our Kitchen. This was one of those garage sale finds that I love. I think I paid $5 for it. And I totally love it. It's such a good reminder to me and the family when we're in the kitchen eating, doing math, reading, cleaning and more about what our family is about. Favorite verse? The one blown up below. Live with a Thankful heart.

Sleeping Samuel. Completely unique to our home. I had to sneak in to get this picture -- even then, he stirred when the shutter clicked on the camera. Love his floppy hair, and how he always sleeps on his little Backyardigans pillow, and is tucked in with his John Deere blanket. Sweet, simple things that bring this mamma a great deal of joy.

Since this was totally random I'm, of course, linking it with my friend, Carissa. Who I met, sigh, a long six months ago. I can hardly believe that was when I was in South Carolina. It feels as if several years of events have happened in that short half of a year. Blessings on your Monday! ~Rachel

a random list of ten facts

I took the weekend off from blogging. No new posts - a couple of comments and thank yous - but in general, I let my computer sit for most of the weekend.  It wasn't planned, but seemed to be needed. It was one quiet weekend, one of thinking, and being unplugged. I think we all need a break at times.

The snow is melting.  All except for our front yard. It's almost a bit embarrassing for me -- you drive down our street and see grass, grass, mega snow, grass, grass, grass. I cannot figure out why our yard hangs on to the not so wanted snow. We've got two huge piles sitting in the front.  Sigh....was it the snow fort? 

{remember this pic? Now all I want is for that snow to melt!}

Even more embarrassing? That I had to google search how to spell embarrass. After three times of seeing the squiggly red line under the word I decided enough was enough, and I swallowed my homeschooling momma pride and looked up the word. 

I have the 30Day Shred by Jillian Michaels. I thought I'd try the easy level. As I was doing it I was thinking that it was no big deal.  Easy. Now when it takes me four times as long to sit up because my abs are so sore I'm starting to be humbled and embarrassed (practice makes perfect with spelling) about my opinion of the 30Day Shred. It might take me longer to complete it....Is there a 30Day Shred + 6 weeks?

I wrote a devotional for five minutes for faith that is published today. I wrote about joy -- and more specifically about finding joy. {Are you surprised?) I'd love for you to read it.  It's called -- I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy....

I don't think Brennan and Caleb (my seven and five year olds) got the idea behind the time change.  Instead of getting up later they've been waking earlier than ever.  Just this morning I heard Caleb wandering downstairs at a little bit past six this morning. Too early, too early, too early. However, it is cute to listen to them talk all stealth like and quiet as they pour their cereal. :) It's not as cute if they get crabby.

{Brennan}

When most people hear that I have seven kids I typically hear them gasp. I always tell the that I am so blessed by my kids.  Sometimes I forget that I have such a big family. It just seems normal for me. And I love the laughter. Oh, we laugh over here -- how could we not?

The girls and I love to watch The Amazing Race on Sunday nights. (Remember, that was the one show I'd love be on.) Anyways, I forget to record the next program at eight at night because many times The Amazing Race gets bumped back due to sports.  So sigh. Last night we arrived home, grabbed our late night snacks (which Jillian Michaels would not approve of) and settled in to watch. Once we realized that 60 Minutes creeped into the first 21 minutes of The Amazing Race we realized that we were doomed.  Oh well, we're thankful for online streaming.  And that Chopped Champions recorded. 

I have nine loads of laundry to fold today.  I'm just saying.  And will take volunteers.

I love lists (which is probably why I write so many on this blog). I'm thinking of writing a top ten list of favorite gluten free resources.  Since it's been two months since Samuel was diagnosed with Celiac Disease I've learned what products I love to use, what's a good value for your money, and to be very very careful about dining out.  He's still recovering from our Olive Garden encounter with gluten from the gluten free menu. We'll see.  What would be on your top ten list? 

{my Samuel, thanks to Hannah for the beauty of a picture}

Now this was a random miscellany monday post.  I kind of needed to be random after being away from the computer -- helped clear the brain.  Enjoy your monday -- hopefully yours is warm, that your snow melts (and if it doesn't don't be embarrassed -- I can spell it now), and that you get exactly done what you need to do. And that your day is filled with joy. :)

the ice planet

1) My Caleb is a Star Wars fanatic.  He's five.  When he was only three years old he found our Nintendo DS with the Star Wars game in it and loved to attempt to play it - even though he didn't know how to get out of the Cantina -- which was the opening menu scene.

that's Caleb when we were at the lake

he's probably thinking about Star Wars

2) Sometimes I'll plunk out a few notes from some of the various Star Wars themes on our piano.   Why?  Because every single time, no matter where Caleb is, he'll come running down to our living room with excitement and his arms waving as he hums the theme.

Hannah captured this beauty

3) Last year I took my kids to the Minnesota Orchestra for a Movies and Music concert.  Even Caleb.  Why, again?  The first song they played was the theme from Star Wars.  Caleb literally jumped up out of his seat and started using his program as a light saber.

4) The other fave of Caleb -- and Brennan?  Legos.  They spend hours building with Legos (and I spend hours cleaning).  And taking pictures with my camera of their creations.

legos, legos, legos everywhere

5) Moms with kids who play legos -- I have a question for you -- do you make them keep the sets together? I mean because the Ice Planet Hoth's Wampa Cave was almost $40. It bugs me when it gets mixed into the Lego boxes, and yet after a while we just let it go.  I do save the directions.

6) Speaking of ice, we had a nasty ice storm here in Minnesota.  My in-laws (including my sister-in-law) were in an accident on their way home from our home. The ice coated the roads instantly, and when they were about 2 miles from their home they approached a hill where everyone stalled or spun out.  My father-in-law attempted to get up the hill, stalled, and then was hit by a car going over the hill who couldn't stop.

7) They found out the next day that the man who hit them was trying to go help his daughter who spun-out a mile farther down the road. There were almost 400 accidents in the metro area.  After 11 pm.

8) My in-laws are fine.  My mother-in-law sprained her wrist.  However, they had to wait over 4hours in the ditch.  With eight other cars.  Including a pizza delivery guy who spun out after them and ended up right next to them.  The police officer joked that maybe they'd all end up with free pizza.

9) Their car?  Probably totaled. (Although I really hope not.)  But, they're safe.  And ultimately that's truly all that matters.

10) Want to know the thread linking this seemingly random miscellany?  Well, my in-laws were at our house the day of the accident for a birthday party where Star Wars Legos were given to my other son Brennan.  However, Caleb, who is two years younger, exclaimed, "this is the best day ever!"  The joys of the large family.

Brennan the birthday boy

thinking about how he can keep those legos together

hot to cold

It has been a week of extremes.
(make sure to scroll down so you see all the pics)

1) On Monday and Tuesday we had temps in the 70's.  In Minnesota.  In November.

2) On Saturday we received over 12 inches of heavy, wet, white snow.  It was 32 degrees.

3) My kids were so excited about the snow.  Elijah grabbed his rain boots, a fall sweatshirt, and a crazy hat and attempted to get outside.  Then the rest of the kids dug through the three, yes three, 18 gallon totes of winter gear.  My living room was destroyed.

4) Then it was quiet.  For 20 minutes.  Then the first couple decided they had enough and that they needed hot cocoa.  My kitchen became a mess.  However, my children had a great day, and the driveway was shoveled (partially), a snowman was built, several snow forts, and countless wet clothes littered the laundry.  Worth it.  Despite the mess. :)

5) In case you don't want to do math on Monday the temperature difference was over 40 degrees.  I guess I might need to put away my sandals.  Except that when I need to get the mail they're easy to slip on.....despite the cold snow that will now reach my toes.  Oh well.  Here in Minnesota it's not uncommon to see someone wearing shorts, a sweatshirt, gloves, and sandals in early March or mid November. Okay, okay, that was me. :)

6) Samuel is still sick.  He's better than Friday, but just does not look right.  He's sleepy, doesn't eat as well, and now has little blisters.  I think it's caused from the strep.  Sigh.  I wish I had put my foot down on Friday and asked them to do a cbc on him.  It would have been reassuring to see the how the wbcount was reacting.

7) Pictures?  I'm struggling to find some. I might just pull some random pictures for you to enjoy today.  Not related to anything above.  Therefore this really equals a true miscellany. :)

random shot #1

that would be Hannah and Grace 

 playing around with Hannah's webcam

random shot #2

Elijah man 

just looking super cute this summer

random shot #3

and Caleb

my son

as a chicken


******************

snow, time, the vote, and cocoa

It's just one of those miscellany type mornings. I've got thoughts churning in my head, but they're not quite yet ready to make it to a blog post.  Soon.  Thank goodness for my miscellany day -- plus it gives you a glimpse into my sarcastic and silly self. :)

1) I woke up today at 5:19 am due to the time change.  I actually love the daylight savings time switch because I wake up earlier and thus feel more productive. It's all a mindset, right?

2) I still have to figure out whether I fall back or spring forward -- you'd think I deciphered the time change by now.  Nope.  Thank goodness for all those little rhymes and tricks.  I'd be lost without them.

3) See this pic?  Right now, us Minnesotans are living on borrowed time.  Once November rolls around you cannot predict whether it hits almost 70 degrees or you get 15 inches of snow.  That's why the meteorologists are payed the big bucks up here.

last winter

4) Most times the weather forecast is wrong (despite being paid the big bucks).  I still watch it. I'm kind of a weather junkie.  Even Caleb, my five year old, loves to check the radar with me.  He's such a great kid. :)

5) If there's a huge snowstorm it becomes the local stations top story.  Seriously.  Sometimes we can have snowstorms each week.  They'll put reporters on bridges over the interstate throughout the metro area, and another by a snowplow, and another in the weather backyard, and another riding with a sheriff.  Snow is big news here. I feel worse for the reporters when they put them in all those places when the temp is 35 below zero.  By the time the camera gets to them they can hardly talk because they're so cold.

6) Even though we homeschool I grant my kids snowdays.  Do you remember, if you lived where there was snow, the excitement of finding out school was closed?  Homeschool kids deserve that as well. We are a snowday friendly homeschool family.

freedom

7) My kids are still sleeping.

8) Never mind.  I hear Elijah upstairs talking about how he's awake and needs food.  Still, for the kids to sleep past 6 am on the fall back time switch (see I got it right) is impressive.

9) Brennan went with me when I voted last week.  As we were leaving the polling place he stated, "if it's a choice to vote, then why doesn't everyone vote?"  He's pretty wise.

10) Then I got Brennan some cocoa from Caribou. He is trained.  Well.

love the sticker

Have a great Monday.  I've got a crazy busy day -- like usual.  Remember to keep your eyes on Jesus even through dishes, diaper changes, laundry, car rides, cooking, reading, cleaning, more dishes, more laundry, more reading, more diaper changes, more car rides, and more.  :)